Friends and privacy

If anyone who has recently added me as their friend wondered why I have not responded, the reason is that I am bothered by the question of respect of privacy.

I would never dream of stalking someone by e-mails or writing on their wall. I would not pass on anyone’s e-mail addres, nor would I expect my friends to release my personal details.

Some German members, in particular, have been approached by a very new member in ways which I can only describe as offensive. I have advised the people concerned to alert Steve and Mark.

I am now reluctant to add anyone else as a friend - is there a way to settle my doubts?

I believe that we are referring to one individual. In any case you do not need to show your email address to your friends. You can decide this in your privacy settings. If we see people behaving obnoxiously on people’s walls we will delete their account.

I allow my friends to see my email address and my skypename but that is entirely up to each member. Check your privacy settings Sanne.

I also think that we should publicize the names of any members who abuse these privacy settings by sending annoying emails right here on the Forum. Do not hesitate to name the offending party.

Thank you for the reminder about the privacy settings.

As my post was more of a preemptive strike, I won’t name anyone at the moment.

Who knows, that particular member may learn a lot about how to get along with others by remaining an active member.

That’s exactly the reason why I’ve hone my profile down to the bare bones ( that’s an interesting phrase - I’ve got it from dict.cc and it isn’t comparable with anyone German phrase).

Is there not a way to “de-friend” a person like on facebook? I am very wary about giving out my email because I don’t like to get spam forwarded to me which seems to be a pretty pleasant past time for many others, my mother included! Therefore, I pretty well always ignore any friend requests from people I don’t know (3 of them in one year!), even though it might seem rude, I’m sorry.

Friendship should be reciprocal. We don’t want to be considered to be a “friend” of someone whom I don’t know or I cannot trust.

I think that the “de-friending” function that Jbudding mentioned is necessary because anyone can join LingQ. He or she might be …

You can unfriend someone anytime you like. Just click the “remove from friends” link.

It’s not just the German tutors that have been getting spammed…

Mark,
You can see the list of friends on a particular person’s page, but I suppose that some of them don’t want to be monitored by the particular person, or to be listed there as his or her friends.

YutakaM has a point: the one-sided “show of friendship” could be against someone’s wishes. Would it be possible for our pictures only to be shown once both sides have agreed to “friendship”?

Am I right in thinking that your activities are monitored by the person who chose you as his or her friend, even if you did not choose him or her as your friend? What article you are studying, and whose wall you posted a comment can be monitored by the person whom you don’t consider to be your friend.

I think that librarians never give you the information of who borrowed a particular book from the library. I suppose that leaking the information is against the law.

Yes, I think you are right, but that is part of the open communication within LingQ.

I have no problem with people knowing what I study or write on people’s walls within LingQ. It’s nice to find things out about others, isn’t it?

I’d just like to see the friendship link only to work once both parties have elected to accept the other person.

I want to add that so far I have not been disappointed in my friends!

"I’d just like to see the friendship link only to work once both parties have elected to accept the other person. "
I agree with SanneT on that.

@yutakaM. yes.I think that is so. and this is a think that I to not like too.for a friendship wi neet to sides.
Ja,ich glaube,so funktioniert es im Moment.Aber ,ich finde für eine Freundschaft braucht es die Zustimmung beider Seiten.
(yes, I believe, so it works now.But, I find a need for friendship, the agreement of both sides.)

"I’d just like to see the friendship link only to work once both parties have elected to accept the other person. "
Me too!

I agree with all.
The "remove from friend " link on his/her page is not enough. Even I don’t want to his/her friend list, once he/she add me on the list, I can not remove it. I don’t want to be added on his/her list, if I don’t like him/her or if he/she is a stranger who have no information on his/her profile.

It was my faux pas, Nobuo. If you had asked me to I would have deleted you at once. Although I hardly ever understand such delicate feelings.

victor2,
Thank you for the comment. Please misunderstand my message. Even if you had very little information on your profile, if you write just “Hi” or something about my interests on my wall or if I’m familiar with your messages on the forum, I’m willing to add back you on my list as a friend.

Now I have been annoyed by a stranger. Click my name and see my wall.
He added me on his list suddenly several days ago. I suggested him to write something yourself on your profile. Then he removed me from his friend list once with his rude comment.

After that he added me again on his friend list. I don’t want to be listed on his list. I asked him to remove me from his list, but he keep my name on his list! I think It’s a kind of harassment.

Please help me, Mark!